Disagreeable Confidant

it has not been easy
to phoenix myself
out of those ashes
of my former life

it seems
there is always
one person
who knew me "when"
who will happily tell
anyone willing to listen
about my bad habits
lost loves
most embarrassing
faux pas

if only I could learn
to just shut up

roadside repair

in early light
as I drove
round a bend
he was there
tiny
vulnerable
eyes wide
too young
he shrank
with fright
as each car
roared past

across the road
his mother
paced nervously
separated
by aeons
of technology
her other kits
tumbled
played
children
without knowledge
of consequence

sun assuming
its morning drive
position
traffic increasing

she had to decide
lose one
or risk all

with no time
to consider
my risks
I hit brakes
dust rose
as I pulled onto
gravel shoulder
grabbed beach towel
off seat
without stopping
to think
I jumped
from my car
ran to him
scooped him up
in soft folds
of clean terry
raised my hand
halted traffic
scooted across
deposited him
10 or 20 feet
back from the curb

mother vixen
ran toward me
intent on defense
then stopped
stared
quiet knowing
as I removed myself
from this family reunion

I returned to my car
door ajar
pocketbook
carelessly open
on the floor

I became aware
of dry mouth
heavily beating heart
trembling hands

engine already running
flywheel screeched
against starter motor
as I turned my key

shook me back

a fine mist cleared
burned away
by intensity

I looked up
to pull away

they were gone

Had it happened?

Was I dreaming?

soft red hairs
on my towel
answered

Chapter Five

Will I always be so honest
about my age?

When a younger man
guesses wrong
off by decades
will I always
shake my head
laugh
then tell the truth?

When people see me
with my oldest son
and ask
"was that your brother?"
will I always
attribute their mistake
to his early maturity
rather than
my tenuous
hold on youth?

Will it always
be so hard
for me
to accept
the turn
of the years?

Will I always
be so honest
about my age
to others
and to myself?

queen of heaven

all men are haunted
by living dead

that one woman
who it was "UH!" with...

it doesn't take much
to start her walking
a breeze
a scent
sight of long hair swaying

and there she is
and is gone

you fools

men console each other
yea bro, I feel you, it's Hard
when they think we're not paying attention

silly boys
you'd think they'd learn
we're always
listening

so you
listen Hard
little brothers

don't take
nothin' for granted

when That Woman
comes into your life
don't fight it

place stars around her feet

or she'll ghost you

forever